"Vocation at Age 40" by Jacob Gapko

On November 15, 2017, Jacob Gapko turned 40! We invited him to speak at worship, and followed up with a birthday party. Here is the text of his reflection.

Vocation at Age 40—Jacob Gapko

My vocational path or calling has been a winding road.  It all began when I was baptized as an infant and freed from sin and death.  Baptism transformed me and my body into a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God and gave me the freedom to live without trying to earn God's favor through works.  My gift of curiosity and asking questions, however, my have dismayed my Sunday school teachers with my militant belief in science as everything—I don’t think I displayed much faith until my teenage years.

When I was three years old I was diagnosed with Duchenne muscular dystrophy (DMD) and, by my teen age years, I knew that my disease would likely shorten my lifespan.  When I was 15, I asked my parents what might seem an odd question, "Do you think I will live to be 29 years old?"  Let me provide a bit of context. I figured out that I should be able to get a Ph.D. in physics by the time I turned 29 (figuring six or seven years after I got my undergraduate degree).  As I have gotten older, I realize I have a gift from God for teaching by example of living a rich and full life in spite of the DMD.  I share my love for music, books, travel, etc. with others as an example of how to live that rich life even with a disability.  I think I’ve done well in treating "failure/loss” as an opportunity to see more clearly the path God wants me to follow.  I’ve not let DMD beat me down.  I did ask a friend what gifts she sees I’ve been given to help me in my vocation.  I was surprised with a list of a dozen gifts—patience, fortitude, gratitude, humility, knowledge, wisdom, kindness, loyalty, contentment, curiosity, persistence, and hospitality.  My message here is:  If you can’t see your gifts, ask someone to describe them for you.

I was a physics major at UW Eau Claire with minors in library science and mathematics.  My gift for physics began in 8^th grade when I won first place in the science for my project in gravitational waves.  My plan was a direct path to my B.S. and then off to graduate school in physics.  For the summer of 1999, I applied to Entry Point, an internship program sponsored by the American Association for the Advancement of Science.  Entry Point is specifically designed for undergraduate and graduate students in STEM (science, technology, engineering, and mathematics) and provides internships at NASA.  The coordinator of this program placed me at NASA’s Goddard Space Flight Center in their technical library because I had a background in both physics and library science.  This opened my mind to another path besides physics, which my physical limitations may have prevented.  I later pursued library science instead of physics for my master’s degree.  I might not have recognized it then, but I do now see that having faith in Jesus took care of the two basic human problems—sin and death—and allowed me to know that there will always be a vocational path for me, even though it may not have been the path I thought I’d take.  God’s will shall be done despite us saying, “no, no, no.”  (Think of Moses as one example.)

As an undergraduate, I was published in the ALAN Review based on my research on the available books by and about those with Duchenne muscular dystrophy.  At that time, I could only find four books.  After I received my Master’s degree, I applied for a grant from the American Library Association to create an annotated bibliography of books by and/or about people living with muscular dystrophy.   This time I was able find about 50 books to review.  My work is still available on the Muscular Dystrophy Association’s website.

With my Master’s degree, I worked for one year as the cataloguer at CVTC and also started graduate school again.  As a doctoral student at UW Madison in Library and Information Studies, I have struggled for many years with the question, “What role should personal experience play in one's research?”  Eventually, I arrived at the conclusion that one should allow personal experience to help direct one's research.  For me this meant that I would study the information needs of persons living with Duchenne or Becker Muscular Dystrophy.  And that is what I am doing currently.  Gifts that God gave me that make working on a PhD possible include an analytical mind, willingness to listen to others, a giving spirit, perseverance, courage, patience, and fortitude.  All are needed to climb the academic mountain that a PhD is.

As for other gifts from God beyond the intellect, I believe I also have the gift of leadership.  I am the current president of the ULC Foundation, which helps fund seminary students and the campus ministry in the ERC.  I served the CVM for 9 years on its board of directors.  I’ve also served on the ULC Council and served a variety of campus organizations as a student, including emceeing the Honors Banquet one year.  We all have different gifts.  Paul instructs us to not hold our God-given gifts above others.  For us to function as the body of Christ, we need everyone’s gifts, not just mine, but yours and everyone elses.

I regularly read the “God Pause” daily devotions from Luther seminary.  The one from

November 8, 2017, concluded with this prayer which I share with you now:  God grant me peace this day.  I surrender my will and my life to you. Teach me anew; make your way through the barred doors of my opinions and prejudices; keep me humble.  Amen.